In Congo lived two brothers who bickered all the time. Each one believed they were smarter than the other. They were always trying to out whit the other and prove their superiority. They were always doing this because they were both competing to win over the princess of the village. Both bothers wanted to marry her and were always trying to show off to her. One day the younger brother decided he was going to put this bickering to rest and prove he was the smarter brother.
So, while the two brothers were out hunting one day they decided that they were going to dig a hole and catch animals in it that way. The older brother said he would take all the males and the younger brother all the females. They agreed and they waited for the animals to start falling into the hole. After a couple days they had some animals but all males. So the older brother had more than enough meat for himself and the younger brother had none. Yet the older brother would still not share. This happened for a couple more days.
The princess of the village got worried that the brothers had been hunting for so long and decided to go look for them. She wondered the woods searching for them but could not find them. They were master hunters and could not be found easily. As she was searching she fell into the hole the brothers had created and was stuck in there.
Finally the brothers had come back to see what they caught for the day and noticed the princess stuck in the hole. Immediately the older brother jumped in to save her while the younger brother just waited up top, knowing exactly what he had just accomplished. Then the younger brother said:
"older brother have you forgotten our agreement...?"
The older brother looked up out of the hole confused.
Then he realized what his brother meant. The princess was a female in the hole and therefore belonged to the younger brother.
Now the younger brother had the princess and truly out whited his older brother.
So, while the two brothers were out hunting one day they decided that they were going to dig a hole and catch animals in it that way. The older brother said he would take all the males and the younger brother all the females. They agreed and they waited for the animals to start falling into the hole. After a couple days they had some animals but all males. So the older brother had more than enough meat for himself and the younger brother had none. Yet the older brother would still not share. This happened for a couple more days.
The princess of the village got worried that the brothers had been hunting for so long and decided to go look for them. She wondered the woods searching for them but could not find them. They were master hunters and could not be found easily. As she was searching she fell into the hole the brothers had created and was stuck in there.
Finally the brothers had come back to see what they caught for the day and noticed the princess stuck in the hole. Immediately the older brother jumped in to save her while the younger brother just waited up top, knowing exactly what he had just accomplished. Then the younger brother said:
"older brother have you forgotten our agreement...?"
The older brother looked up out of the hole confused.
Then he realized what his brother meant. The princess was a female in the hole and therefore belonged to the younger brother.
Now the younger brother had the princess and truly out whited his older brother.
Congo. Jbdodane, 2014. Flickr.
Authors Note:
While writing my own story I decided to keep a similar story line. In the original the younger brother leaves and finds a man and together they build the hole and they have the same set up for who gets what as I used in my story. Then the younger brothers wife falls in the hole and the man claims. Then the man goes into the hole to get the wife and now there is a male in the hole and the younger brother technically owns him. They both agree to let go and they separate.
Bibliography:
"The Younger Brother Who Knew More Than The Elder" Notes on the Folklore of the Fjort by Richard Edward Dennett. Web source.
"The Younger Brother Who Knew More Than The Elder" Notes on the Folklore of the Fjort by Richard Edward Dennett. Web source.
Hi Katlyn!
ReplyDeleteThis story was so amusing! I really liked how the story ended, but I would have loved to read about how the older brother took the news and how the princess felt about it as well. Also, was it simply chance that all the animals they had caught up until the princess were all males? Or was the older brother doing something to increase his gains?
Hi Katlyn!
ReplyDeleteFun story! The opening description of two competing brothers is spot on; my sister and I fought all the time when we were little over absolutely nothing in most cases. I like that although the princess becoming trapped was just pure chance, the younger brother is quick to declare his superior wit (which I think was spelled as whit within the story) and triumphs on basically a technicality.
The only recommendation I have is to perhaps develop a bit of begrudging respect between the two brothers at the end. Even something as simple as an epilogue sentence relating how they lived the rest of their lives, and whether the princess actually agrees to their pact and marries the younger brother. This could contrast nicely with the opening descriptions of how their lives were before the incident, and I wonder whether anything between them changed (for the better, hopefully).
I liked it a lot! Thanks!
Hi Katlyn,
ReplyDeleteI like your story, it's quirky and fun! The one thing I would suggest would be to look it over for grammatical errors. There weren't many, but it's something that could really help out in the future! Also, I wonder if it would be better if the younger brother was the one who set the terms of the hunt, and knew there were no females in the area. That way he is basically laying a trap for the older brother, so that he can have the princess. But those are the only points I had! Good story!
Hi Katlyn! Your story had a really funny plot twist ending I did not see coming. I know me and my brother are always bickering ourselves, so I love that you chose a story about sibling rivalry. I think to really develop this story you could include dialogue between the siblings showing their fights and witty comments to one another. Also, if you named the characters it would add some personality. Cool story!
ReplyDeleteHey Katlyn. I really enjoyed your story because it required a very smart character. He knew exactly what he was planning and he was sure his brother would want the male animals to show that he was stronger and could handle the males. The younger one had planned this all along and it was nice how the older brother still agreed to the agreement even though he didn't want to at all.
ReplyDelete